Bunch of Guys in OBX for the Weekend

Tinder Fun

Over the weekend my friends and I went down to North Carolina for a little vacation. We had a blast at the beach and local museums and tourist destinations. Just joking, we sat around on Tinder all day. If you don't know what Tinder is, this website will help you find out.

Any way, basically I was trying to see how ridiculous i could get and still get these strangers to respond to me. 

Lets start with Megan. Megan and I talked about vacations in Jamaica and my legless brother.

Next came Victoria. Victoria was RELENTLESS. She just kept on responding. She also helped me save a friendship with my lactose intolerant friend Nick.

Mackenzie helped settle a bet that ended up getting Ken really hurt.

Meredith wasn't shy about her racism, so I thought I'd try to dig deeper into that

Chloe was actually very attractive and apparently the nicest girl ever. Either that or she called my bluff perfectly. ASL means American Sign Language

Maria initiated conversation with me and we bonded over our lazy eyes.

Now here are all the girls that were smart enough to never respond and hopefully block me.

Black Rock, Maui

 

 

 

 

Book Suggestions

It's midnight and I have had a couple drinks and I figured I love reading so why not throw around some suggestions. Again, if you don't enjoy reading books then don't read any further and kudos to you because the anti-education movement is at an all time high these days. I on the other hand love reading. So I figure I'll put together a list. If people like it then I can do another one. I'll break it down by category.

Gritty Crude Realism

This here is my favorite. Technically this genre just falls under literature and 'literature' usually means it is a book about life that doesn't necessarily have a thick plot. I could name a lot of classics like The Great Gatsby or Old Man and the Sea, which are fantastic reads, but I figure I'll keep this list modern.

Chump Change - Dan Fante

Dan Fante is my all time favorite writer. In the forum of literature, in my opinion this is how the apple fell... Hemingway was the first person to write with actual real dialogue. Hem wrote how people actually talked and what men actually thought. Then Bukowski came around and he took the realistic dialogue and then added some humor and self deprecating realism. Then Dan Fante came and he said I'll match your real dialogue and I'll match your self deprecating realism and I'll up you the most honest to god, gut wrenching, heart spilling feelings that you deserve. I'm not joking, Fante writes and you read and your thinking, jesus christ man how could you let the public into these feelings? Sorry for babbling, he's my favorite author and I send him emails and he responds so I like that. All his books are good but Chump Change is his first and I like reading things in order.

Charles Bukowski - Post Office

Alright yeah he's not modern, whatever. See above for why I like Bukowski so much. His real work is his poetry but his first novel hooked me with its humor and grit. 

Film Noir

Dan Woodrell - Winters Bone

Woodrell's work has been classified as Southern Film Noir. Little known fact about me: I love the south. I'm infatuated with it. Woodrell lives in the deep south, he grew up there, he understands it. Even if you don't want to read this book go ahead and watch the movie. It's where I first fell in love with Jennifer Lawrence. All of his books are great. I suggest this one first because it had been adapted to a movie and that usually gets peoples attention.

Dennis LeHane - Darkness Take My Hand

LeHane is modern noir. Ever heard of the movies Mystic River, Gone Baby Gone, or Shutter Island? Yeah, he wrote all those books. He is very good at what he does. I chose Darkness Take My Hand because it is the first of his series with the characters Patrick Kenzie and Angela Gennaro. Be careful because if you read the first one you will have to read all of them.

Funny Crime

Elmore Leonard - Any Book

Leonard is the originator of funny smooth talking criminals. If you like Jules and Vincent from Pulp Fiction then you will love all the criminals in Leonards books. Choose any, there are tons to chose from. Leonard wrote basically a book a year for four decades. Luckily he just passed away so it gives you a chance to catch up. Just joking, he was a legend and his death is sad as ever.

Tim Dorsey - Triggerfish Twist

Dorsey is one of many Leonard impressionists. Him and Carl Hiassen being the only ones of note. I read Triggerfish Twist the summer before freshman year of HS and remember it being hilarious. So either it is juvenile humor or it is actually hilarious, I'm choosing the latter.

Mystery

Grant Jerkins - A Simple Crime

I promise you you will read this book in a day or two. Quick moving, always changing, very good. His second book did not disappoint either.

Dan Fante - Point Doom

Like I said earlier, I love Fante. He is my favorite writer. His latest book was a mystery and it is not for the faint of heart. It is violent and graphic and in your face and straight gross at times. I loved it.

War

Stephen Ambrose - Band of Brothers

If you are interested in the day to day life of the infantry soldier in World War Two.

Tim O'Brien - The Things We Carried

If you are interested in the emotional effect the war has on soldiers.

John Steinbeck - When the moon is Full 

If you are interested in the effect a war has on everyday townspeople

Autobiography

Billy Crystal - 700 Sundays

If you want to laugh your ass off then cry your eyes out within 200 pages this book is for you. I found it for a dollar at a used book sale and figured why not. Read it in a day and was moved on every page. I made all my family members read it and they felt the same way. A very easy and good read.

Artie Lange - Too Fat to Fish

Hilarious. Crude. In your face. Hilarious.

Poetry

Derrick Brown - Scandalabra

Brown is actually a spoken word poet. This is my favorite spoken poem by him. His poetry is romantic and wordy and beautiful. Full of thoughtful metaphors and feelings that you never realized you felt.

Raegan Butcher - Stone Hotel

This poetry is very different than Browns. Its simple. Many of you would even question if its poetry or if its just sentences broken up by hitting the enter button. The book chronicles Butchers time spent in prison. It reads very fast and gives great insight to life behind bars.

Young Adult

Jonah Black - Diary of a Teenage Stud

This is a four part series and when I say young adult I mean young adult. These are the very four books that made me fall in love with books and with writing because I read them when I was in eighth grade and I felt completely connected. I have reread them countless times since. You can literally finish a book a day easily. If you have a son or brother or friend that is a boy in middle school or early high school and they enjoy reading give them these books. Tell them I said so.

Stephen Chbosky - The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Might be the easiest book to read ever. The wording is so simple yet so thought provoking. This is the kind of book I wish I could write but I have never been depressed or molested or sad so there goes my chance at being a famous writer. In all honesty this book will move you.

Books Written by Me

Jimmy O'Brien - Alcohol & Adderall: my last days of college

Just joking. I have no copies left. You can't read it even if you wanted to.

Brett Surprised Courtney in Hawaii for Christmas. I got lost at sea and died.

Luke and I had the task of distracting her while we snuck Brett into the room. Obviously we simply just told her she had to do an interview. "An interview? okay sure." Weird family I guess.

Oh and I also lost my mind.

Full Video of the trip to come.